Day 15
Why We Complain
This explanation comes from Dr. Robin Kowalski and also from the book, Complaint Free World by Will Bowen.
The acronym is G.R.I.P.E.
G - Get attention
R- Remove responsibility
I - Inspire Envy
P- Power
E- Excuse poor performance
Get Attention
We have an innate need to be loved. One of the ways we notice it is when other people notice us. When we do not feel we have a satisfactory portion of this in our life, sometimes we get it by acting out. "HEY! NOTICE ME!"
Remove Responsibility
This complainer is a major blamer. They are justified in their own actions to the point of not taking responsibility for their own lack of effort. "My dog ate my homework for the next two weeks."
Inspire Envy
Braggers saying, look at that flaw that I certainly don't have. Inspiring envy is a backhanded way of stating someone is better than someone else. "My boss is stupid." is a way of saying, I am smarter then my boss or, "she is a slob" making me a tidy, well-organized person. The gossiper is superior to the one being gossiped about.
Power
Complaining is a way in which one exerts power over someone else for control. It is a way of putting someone else down in order to purchase power. It can also be used as a way of recruiting an army to fight for you. If we complain about our competition it will help us look more powerful and get more people to believe this. I’m not sure if you have ever seen this in a presidential debate...
Excuse of Poor Performance
Maybe this could have been called rational lying if somehow it fit into the G.R.I.P.E acronym. This excuse for poor performance is used when the complaint is about the circumstance after the situation has happened. "The sun was in my eyes."
Knowing why we complain is helpful in understanding what we need to do in order to change it.
Challenge Enhancement
Today, take responsibility for your actions, notice other people’s gifts, say something nice to your opponent if you feel competitive and own your performance in life.